2 May 2023

Last week I wrote a little about the need for potential new parishioners to be able to “see themselves” in the congregation of the church they are trying out. Whilst it is impossible for every demographic to be represented and visible in even the largest congregation, a closed monocultural church community may put off rather than attract new members, purely because people tend to act like members of a private club. Many parishes proclaim themselves to be “inclusive”, but what does this mean if to be “included” you need to be a certain age, or a certain skin colour, or a certain family demographic to be allowed to join in?

I would like to explore in a little more depth the idea of a church community as “inclusive”, first by saying that this is something for which every parish needs to aim. If we do not actively include then, intentionally or not, we exclude. And the systematic exclusion of entire demographic groups is a recipe for a dying church.

Let’s return to Annabelle’s experience of visiting a church, as narrated last week. What might it have taken for her first experience of an almost exclusively older white congregation to have ended not in her seeking out “people like her” in another church, but instead finding something that she wanted to get to know a bit more about, and perhaps even to join?

Annabelle is a young Singaporean student who became a Christian after moving to Australia.  She has moved to a new flat and thinks she might like to attend a church near to her new home. She looks up options on Google and discovers an Anglican church just around the corner. She has some friends who attend an Anglican church near her university, so she thinks she might give the local one a go. She turns up at 10am the following Sunday and is greeted by a group of older people chatting out the front of the church, one of whom hands her a booklet and asks her whether she’s been to this church before. She quickly explains that the booklet contains all she will need to follow the service. Another elderly lady in the group offers to sit with her as it’s her first time. Annabelle notices that there is no-one even close to her age in the congregation, and that hers is the only Asian face, but the elderly lady is very friendly and asks her about what she is studying at university. It turns out that she is a retired professor. The service begins with a song, just like in her old church, but this one sounds very traditional. Annabelle can read music and the music for the song is pretty simple and is printed in the booklet, so by about verse three she’s got the hang of it and joins in. The minister preaches a sermon about how God loves everyone, regardless of age, ethnicity, gender or sexuality, based on 1 John 3. Annabelle has never heard a sermon like this. She’s intrigued. The service is very formal, but people are smiling, and there’s a nice smell made by the smoke machine someone waves around up the front. At the end of the service her new friend Elizabeth encourages Annabelle to stay for coffee. The coffee is hot and strong, and there are some really yummy cakes. A couple of other people talk to her and share some stories about the church. By the time she leaves Annabelle has talked to half a dozen people, and one couple have invited her to come to lunch next Sunday and to bring a friend if she’d like to.  Annabelle no longer feels quite so worried that there is no one her age in this church. She wonders whether next week she might bring along a couple of friends from her old church who are missing their grandparents back home in Singapore. It was nice to talk to older people again. It felt a bit like home. They might enjoy this church too.

This was the same monocultural congregation as Annabelle #1 met last week, but instead of behaving like a closed club, they had learned how to behave like an open and inclusive church, and in the process had made their church more attractive to Annabelle. So what was different?

-       There was more than one person at the door, and they welcomed the stranger.

-       Annabelle was not left to fend for herself in a new and foreign environment.

-       One person (Elizabeth) made the effort to establish a point of connection (University) and to act as a new friend.

-       The liturgy and preaching were easy to follow, engaging, Jesus-centred and inclusive in the broadest sense rather than boring, inaccessible and focussed exclusively on the existing congregation.

-       The post-service hospitality was generous and home-like.

-       There was an invitation to come back again, not a suggestion to try elsewhere.

Annabelle might or might not return. If she does she might or might not bring some friends. She might or might not make this her regular church home. However there is a very much greater chance that she will do all of these things if her initial experience is one of the sort of welcome that transcends demography and concentrates on simple humanity.